Soul Mate?

Q. When does God give a person his or her soul mate? How does one know if a person is right for them?

Shenella, via email

A. Here’s a reply from TCA columnist Father Ray Ryland, Ph.D., J.D:

The term “soul mate” is ambiguous. I assume you mean a spouse.

God has a perfect plan for each of His children. The basic human task is to try to discern what God wants us to do with our precious lives. To what state of life is He calling us? The religious state? The married state? The single state? And whatever the state, to what specific labor in His behalf is He calling us?

Consider the married state. Suppose you find yourself being drawn to a particular person.

The first thing you need to know about that person is the kind and depth of that person’s relationship with God. I once knew a little girl who grew into a beautiful and devout young woman and teacher. Some of her third-graders asked her why she wasn’t married. Her prompt reply was, “Because I haven’t found a man who would love Jesus more than he would love me.” Unless spouses each love Jesus above all, they cannot build a truly Christian marriage.