November 2009:  Youth Ministry

Questioning Faith

By Mary Lou Rosien

It is a fairly common quote, “There are no stupid questions.”  We encourage young people to ask questions about life, school work and politics, but when they question their own faith we panic.

We are currently having this struggle with our son, Nicholas.  As a mother and faith educator, to hear my son question God, Catholicism, and even the Eucharist, breaks my heart.  However, I have faith that this is not the end of Nick’s journey, but the beginning of deep faith. Scripture teaches, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6) I have hope in this promise from God.

1. Encourage Questions.

It is my own experience that the things we question and explore on our own become more important than the things we just accept.  The process of asking refines our own ideas about anything. When we are in the role of faith formation educators we can encourage honest discussion of faith issues and even doubt or lack of faith.

In the book of Sirach it states, “Wisdom becomes known through speech, and education through the words of the tongue.” (4:24) In this case, it would seem that the beginning of wisdom may be questions. 

2.  Share Saint stories.

Sharing with students stories of the Saints who have struggled with their own faith may encourage them in their process.  St. Thomas the apostle doubted that Jesus had actually appeared to the other apostles.  Yet, he exclaimed with intense faith, “My Lord and my God,” upon having his doubts removed.

St. Augustine of Hippo made many mistakes and lived a very worldly life until he had a conversion (due in part to his mother, Monica’s, prayers of almost twenty years) at the age of thirty-two.  He became the Bishop of Hippo and his written description of his confessions have been responsible for the conversion of many others.

St. Therese of Lisieux struggled with the temptation of atheism even on her death bed.  The resistance to this struggle helped to make her holy.

More recently, even Mother Theresa struggled with not feeling the consolation of God’s love and the doubts that ensued.  The important lesson in her life was that she followed God’s Will even while she struggled with it.

3. Have expectations.

It is perfectly acceptable to hold children accountable to certain family and faith expectations.  My husband and I tell our kids, that during their faith struggles we expect them to continue to attend Mass with us.  It is a family expectation and just like they have expectations that we will give them rides to friends’ houses, have dinner ready at night and give them material things that they need, we expect them to attend Mass with us as a family.  We also remind them that they might find answers (if they go to Mass) that they would not find if they stay away.  We urge them to look at who or what would want them to stay away from God.  (i.e. the evil one)  Teenagers often believe in evil more easily than they believe in good, using that as a springboard to discuss God can be helpful.

4. Pray hard.

Keep that image of St. Monica, “Praying with tears,” in your mind as you pray for the young people in your care.  God bless, oh, and please pray for Nick. Thanks.

Mary Lou Rosien writes from North Chili, NY.  She is the author of Managing Stress with the Help of Your Catholic Faith (OSV Publishing). Email her at mrosien@rochester.rr.com.