Msgr. M. Francis Mannion

Mean confessor

Church urges priests to be Good Shepherds and Good Samaritans in the confessional

Question: I consider myself a practicing Catholic. However, I have not been to confession for years, as the last time I went the priest was mean to me. He put me off the sacrament. Do you think this is a major reason for the decline of confession?

-- Name and address withheld

Answer: There are many reasons for the decline in confession in recent decades. People tell me that they find confessors variously unwise, boring, lacking in understanding, but I have very rarely heard that priests are mean in the confessional. But any complaint is one too many.

There is absolutely nothing in the pastoral theology of the Church which encourages priests to be tough on penitents in the celebration of the sacrament. Indeed, the principal images of confessors in the official rites of the Church are all positive and encouraging.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states: ''When he celebrates the sacrament of Penance, the priest is fulfilling the ministry of the Good Shepherd who seeks the lost sheep, of the Good Samaritan who binds up wounds, of the Father who awaits the prodigal son and welcomes him on his return, and of the just and impartial judge whose judgment is both just and merciful. The priest is the sign and the instrument of God's merciful love for the sinner'' (No.1465).

The image of the judge is, granted, a little intimidating. It has to be used with care.

Priests are also reminded that they are not the master of the sacrament. On this, the Catechism declares: ''The confessor is not the master of God's forgiveness, but its servant. The minister of this sacrament should unite himself to the intention and charity of Christ. He should have a proven knowledge of Christian behavior, experience of human affairs, respect and sensitivity toward the one who has fallen; he must love the truth, be faithful to the Magisterium of the Church, and lead the penitent with patience toward healing and full maturity. He must pray and do penance for his penitent, entrusting him [or her] to the Lord's mercy'' (No. 1466).

The Church has high expectations of priests in the celebration of confession. Priests who act in a manner contrary to what is described here are offending against the sacrament and against the good of those who go to confession.

May I suggest that you put your bad experience behind you and that you go to confession to a priest with a proven record of good pastoral practice?

Televised Mass

Question: A member of my family and I have a dispute over fulfilling the Sunday obligation by watching Mass on television. I say it does not fulfill the obligation; she says the obligation is fulfilled by watching on television. Who is correct?

-- Mary M. KerlinHamilton, N.J.

Answer: Your position is the correct one. The only way someone can fulfill his or her obligation on Sundays and holy days is by actual attendance at and participation in the celebration of the sacrament.

However, the obligation to attend Sunday Mass does not apply in the situation of illness or old age. Thus, watching Mass on television may be the next best thing.

Proper funeral attire

Question: My elderly sister wants to be buried in her wedding dress. She's a little kooky. What do you think?

-- Name and address withheld

Answer: You mean with white veil and all? I say she can be buried in whatever she wants. There are few traditional rules left in our society. At this point in one's life/death, what difference does it make?

Msgr. M. Francis Mannion is a priest and theologian of the Diocese of Salt Lake City. Send your questions to Pastoral Answers, Our Sunday Visitor, 200 Noll Plaza, Huntington, IN 46750 or to mfmannion@osv.com. Letters must be signed, but anonymity may be requested.